Leprechaun Lane 5k

 

Race Day Pics

Sweetheart Shuffle 5k

Race number 2 is in the books. Can't really call it a race because we decided to walk it due to inclement weather. Snow boots in tow we hoofed it in just over an hour. :P

Weight Update 2014

As you can see I've gained since my last weight update...Thing is my clothes are still baggy and well, I'm seeing more muscle definition. Lean muscle gain? Possibly. Either way I'm tired of fighting with the scale. I want to see that 1 at the beginning of the number. I did really well this month (check out the weight log) and then blew it last night before this mornings weigh in.

Last minute our neighbor called and had us meet up with a former neighbor at the local pub for dinner. Yes...bar food and I indulged. I had a giant greasy burger and french fries...and I shared some honey barbecue boneless wings. Hey, I drank tons of water. :P

So, either way I still lost for the month but now it's time to really buckle down. No candy/junk February is about to go down!

Goals - February

💖 February 2014 Goals 💖

💖 Hit 100lbs Deadlift PR -- I really really want to hit this PR. I am not sure why I am set on reaching 100lbs other than it seems like a good attainable number. 😉 

💖 More sleep; more than the usual 5 hours a night -- I've slowly been working on this and for the last couple of weeks I cannot stay up past midnight, with the exception of a couple of days ago when baby boy got sick. Still, I will strive to get the sleep my body needs in order to recover. 

💖 Aim for the ever so sought after Onederland -- I have been reaching to break that 200 pound mark for what seems like forever and I truly believe I am so close. So close in fact that I have told myself I will get a reward, the first I've ever given myself on this journey; A new tattoo! 

💖 Stop stressing so much -- I stress over not seeing "enough o this or that" I stress way too much over little things and stress leads to building of cortisol which leads to excess fat retention...I NEED that fat gone, therefore I really have to work on my stress. 😜

Speaking of Onderland... the next post will be a weight update!

Soul Searching

I have come to the realization that I have been holding myself back. Not seeing the scale budge has put me in a major funk. Now, you know that I know that the scale is not the only form of measurement. But when you've been on a journey for this long and are accustomed to seeing definitive numbers change and then it stops...you tend to get discouraged.

I have seen changes in my physical appearance, more definition in my muscles, definitely feeling stronger in my legs, but I NEED to see the scale move. I lust after seeing a "1" at the beginning of my weight. Is this an issue for me? Yes. It has become a revolving issue that seems to have me paralyzed, fixated to the point of self sabatoge.

Looking back things seemed like such a cake walk. I eat, I work out, the weight fell off. Now...I've fallen off track. I just need to figure out how to get that drive back. I still workout regularly but I'm not seeing the progress I think I should see. Am I delusional? Is this normal, to work so hard for two years and then hit a brick wall? I hate feeling like a negative Nancy...I prefer my positive upbeat self over this sad, disappointed persona that has shown through.

I've narrowed my problems down:

• I cheat too much - I've worked really hard on this issue this month and made it 24 days without a cheat.
• Winter weather sucks - I love running, particularly in hot hot hot weather and I just cannot make myself get out there in this arctic air.  I need more cardio...seriously. I have actually contemplated selling a kidney for a decent treadmill.  (Just kidding)
• I let the numbers define me - I'm 100% a numbers person. I have to see those changes in a definitive way. I long for the mornings that the scale shows a reduction in weight and completely trash talk myself when it doesn't move.
• I know my weaknesses - I know that chocolate and sweet junk are the death of me. I try to tell myself it's okay to have a "little of this" in the house for the kids, but I know in my heart it will end up passing through my lips.  I cannot resist it. The only way it's possible to keep it around is if my husband hides it. If I don't know it's there, I cannot crave it.
• I think I can hide it - All too often I sneak a bite of this or that, and those bites add up. It's all too true, what you eat in private, you wear in public.

So , as I do most nights, I peruse my IG feed and run across this amazing fit quote and "BAM" it hits me. All of these problems, those are exactly describing the old me. The one who was unhappy, weak and tired. I absolutely cannot go back there. I refuse to go back there.  The answers are right in front of me. I know my weaknesses, and strengths. I have done this before and I will continue to do this. I'm starting at square one and making it work once again. I will adjust my nutrition plan to suit me and my needs and tweak it as needed. I will trash the junk in our home. I will get myself back down the path to good health (not that I truly left it).

I will do this. I will defeat the old me once and for all. I am strong. I am working every day to be the best version of myself. I can do this.

Groundhog Run 5k

The first race of the season has been completed!

Pre-Race

Post Race

Chip Time: 39:47.7 | Age Place: 127/171 | Overall Place: 1386/1801

I'm excited to see what this year's race season brings. We, Marisa & I, now have a solid base to start with and we look forward to improving our time!