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Well, spank me I'm a bad girl. So be prepared to hear every excuse under the sun as to why I haven't been in the basement working out, why my eating habits suck and why I probably haven't lost any weight.

Seriously I am in a FUNK. F-U-N-K, funk. Adam helped me to see my way out of it a little this afternoon. I don't know what caused it or why it's hanging around but I know there's sunlight out there somewhere right? I KNOW I should be working out, but I have a bazillion excuses and are any of them really valid? Probably not.

I don't know what I really need to end this funk, but I need to find it fast. Perhaps it's the lack of holiday funds, the insurmountable pile of laundry needing to be done, or it could be that there's not a lot of room in the basement at the moment and I hate feeling closed in. It could be that having two children under two is not setting well with my energy level, and my energy level is low because I'm obese; vicious cycle I know. But really, is any of this a reason to give up? I guess not. Suppose I'll figure a way out of this and I'm hoping for sooner rather than later.

Day 5

Sorry for the crappy pic, but I felt awesome after my workout! Oh and you get to see what I currently look like, sorta. ;)

Back on the horse again. Tonight was a later workout than what I wanted, but I was torn between rowing and finishing my football game. Love me some Huskers. So I decided to just do it. Besides I'll be up half the night w/ Evan and trying to get him to sleep for more than two hours at a time. Back to rowing. After my blisters I decided that I would whip out my old riding gloves, you know from back in the day when I could sit on my bike and do a 14 mile ride with my hubby. They sooooooo helped. So I guess I need to see if they make actual gloves for rowing, note to self.

Amber suggested that if I felt up to it, since my splits were under 3:00, that I could aim for 2:40. Well, I must say I shocked the crap out of myself when my first interval split was 2:30. It wained a little after that because of course you wear down after a while, but the whole point of rowing is endurance and that's something that will come with time. I am however very happy that all four interval splits were under 2:45. SCORE! I really am digging rowing, have I mentioned that? So I'll be back tomorrow with more updates! Oh and only 3 more days till weigh in. :o)

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Day 4

FAIL! :/

I'm not making excuses, just wanting to put down what happened so when I look back I can say...oh that's why you didn't lose anything! Yesterday we babysat our Goddaughter and then I had to work a show. So on the down side I didn't get anytime on the rower, but I was standing on my feet and walking for four hours at work. Gotta love show biz!?!?! So I can say I did get a little exercise in, just not the kind I wanted. Here's to a better tomorrow.

Day 3

Well tonight I took a break. The main reason being that hubby surprised me with a date, a much needed date. My MIL came over and watched the kids while Adam took me to dinner (Gambino's) and then we did some Christmas window shopping and picked up some stocking stuffers for the kids. The time away from the kids was short, but amazing. I never knew how awesome silence from the back seat is. But then again, I had a few "I miss my midget" moments when I didn't hear my little parrot talking to me.

So, long of the short I took a break, but will get back to it tomorrow. We're also going to train Evan to sleep through the night, so the next few nights will be a little rough, so pray for us. As for my food, today was better. I also decided that, once we have the money, I will be renewing my body bugg subscription. I LOVED that thing. I'm the "must see the numbers" type of girl, so being able to upload my daily steps, calories burned and meeting my goals is a MUST for me. It also will allow me to track my calorie intake and make sure I'm meeting my daily calorie deficit. BIG PLUS!!! BUT, I also need to find a way/person to show me what foods I need to be eating. I mean, seriously what good are the tools if the fuel you're imputing is full of crap? I'm no genius when it comes to "eat this, don't eat that." I had a trainer before and he was all "eat xx carbs, xx protein, ect." and I was all, oh really? Hmmm, what can I eat that makes that up? Yeah, I cannot for the life of me make up a meal plan. So I have to find someone/something that can help me. There has to be a program out there that says, you need xxx calories, eat xxx. Anyone? Eh, I'm still going to look into seeing a nutritionist, I know that would at least be a step in the right direction.

Day 2

Another day is in the books. And I must say I'm very proud of myself. I have three war wounds now, one on my left heel, and one under each ring finger. Lord I hate blisters. So I learned that I'm griping the handles too tight. Guess I need to work on that. Other than those things I WAS AWESOME. Being that it was only my second go round I improved my splits and did better with managing my strokes per minute.



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So the low down is this: I had a 2:45.0/500m and an average 22 s/m. This is an awesome improvement over last night and what I will strive to continue to reach, until I'm in better shape that is. ;) I also dove into the information/wires that came with our rower and am using the log card that came with it to track my progress (hence the new pic). It also ranks me against other online rowers, not that I'm concerned with that right now. I just like being able to see the number all in one place. I'm totally psyched to see my progress! The other upside is that it saved my work out so I don't have to program it for my intervals each time now. I'm such a smartie some times. LOL.

As for the calorie aspect, today wasn't too bad. Although I know I didn't take in enough calories and the ones I did eat/drink were empty calories. NOT GOOD. By the next go round for grocery shopping I am hoping to replace "usual suspects" with healthy alternatives. I'm almost leaning towards seeing if our insurance covers the cost of seeing a dietitian. I don't know, something to think about I suppose.

I will say I feel better about myself right now. The fact that I am digging these work outs and wanting to continue to do it amazes myself. I'm praying that I will keep up this energy, this want to accomplish something great in my life...a healthier me.

In picture news I've decided to have Adam take some "before" pictures for me, you know like the ones you see in commercials. But seriously, when I had a gym membership it was something my trainer highly recommended. You can use it not only for nostalgic purposes, but as a means to never return to that unhappy place in your life. I'm not a huge fan of photographs of myself, but for the sake of showing the progress to myself, I think I need these photographs. Although, it may be a while before I share them with the public.

 

Goal Number One - Accomplished!

I did it! I feel like I should start doing the Dora "we did it" dance right now, but I'll save it for later.

It feels so amazing to workout. Oh how I've missed this energizing feeling my body has. I'm a far cry from meeting my goal weight, but taking the first step is one of the most important. My weapon of choice is the rowing machine. Adam & I purchased it back in the early spring because it was a good fit for our home and lifestyles. Problem is, I just let it sit there. Adam however has been a healthy kick for a while now and is working out at work and home. He is trying to drop below 200 pounds before the first of the year. Right now he's doing an amazing job and I'm proud of him for what he's accomplished.

As for tonight I did a 4x5, four 5 minute intervals with 4 minutes of rest in between each set. I'm relying on my friend, Amber, to tell me if I got my intervals wrong. I'm also relying on her rowing expertice to help me improve my times and tell me if I'm slacking. It's been a while since we've discussed rowing, so my memory is a little fuzzy.

So, here's the good, the bad and the ugly for tonight:

22 s/m | 3:03 ave/500 m

 

22 s/m | 3:05 ave/500 m



24 s/m | 3:11 ave/500 m



27 s/m | 2:57 ave/500 m

*s/m =  strokes per minute

Now, I don't think this is too shabby considering I haven't been on this machine since May? I'll have to see what my friend Amber says. But bottom line is I FEEL GOOD!!! I had a rough day, due to seeing the dentist, barely ate any food (which I know is a no-no), but on the plus side I only had one Coke. None of that matters because I feel good about what I accomplished just by getting on the machine and working out.

Next goal: Work out at least 5 out of 7 days.

Here We Go

Well, here we go with round two. Yes, I started this blog earlier this year, and then I deleted it. I deleted in a depressive-don't wanna do it state of mind. But I'm back.

I re-discovered an old friends blog today and it lit a fire under my hiney. She started out close to 300 pounds and a year later is sitting around 190 pounds. How did she do it? Perseverance. Something I could use a little of. I too am near 300 pounds. I'm not quite ready to reveal my true weight. I need a little help I think. But I know in my heart that I need to do something about it.

This is not the person my husband fell in love with and married. I have been unhappy with my body since I can remember (probably my early 20s). Having two children in under two years doesn't help my case any. I mean I was four months post partum when we conceived E. Gah, how did I get to be this obese shell of a person? I think along the way of gaining weight I've managed to lose my personality. I just think that "this" person isn't the real me. I want to find the real me, the one who eats sensibly, who works out, who MAKES time for working out, who is able to keep up with her children. Who isn't afraid to be in a photograph with her children. I think that's another issue that has me down. Looking back there are very few photographs with me and my children because I'm ashamed of the way I look. My children aren't going to have many photographs of me and I want to change that.

So you get a picture of what I'm going through here's a short timeline of me from the past to present.

1998, Senior year of high school, prom to be exact. A nice, healthy 160 pounds. :)



2007, Our Wedding Day. If memory serves right I weighed 224 pounds. I was in a size 18W wedding dress.

  

September 2010. This is the most current picture of me. Not a pretty one at all. That is me, 275 pounds.

Wow, I didn't think I'd actually be able to put my weight on there, but I did it. That was a huge milestone. As for goals, I have a number rolling around my brain as to where I want to get. But for now I will start out with my first goal of rowing tomorrow at home. I WILL DO IT! With the support of my husband, I know I can.

So this will be the beginning of my journey. A journey to a new me, a healthy me, and a me that I will love again. I just have to say thanks to my friend for helping to jump start this journey.